Monday, December 10, 2007

Back Shopping

Back Shopping

Just came back from 'shopping'... came back with a heap of bags.

There's Chemistry by fate, Worries by insecurities & self-doubt, L.oV.e by tenderness and Hope by Him + Future.

How did Fate happen, no one knows exactly. He supposedly never or seldom sends a heart out to anyone on Fridae but i strongly recall him being the initiator of the heart services. Either way, i became the more proactive party after receiving the heart. Two simple reasons being... he's a fotographer and he's cute (my kinda cute anyway).

I wouldn't say we have the best Chemistry ever but the feeling was comfortable and we were companionable.. an unspoken affinity between two desperately lonely souls.

So the emotions envelop and engulf me, leaving me giddy and wayward. I stand by the walkway looking straight ahead but nothing keeps still, my path continues to waver. Insecurities and Self-doubt diffuses itself from the surroundings and slowly seep into my very being. Worries, i now have a bag load to offer.

First off from the worry department is the inferiority complex. He is so much better then i deserve, better education, difference in upbringing, difference in lifestyle, etc etc. Not that it's anything unusual, i often get that feeling when i'm with others but it's still an emotion that has to be reined in or fear losing control of. At the end of the day, i suppose it's how confident you are about yourself. At the moment i'm slowing building up on mine.

One of my biggest fear is being cheated on and lied upon. It begin from my parents who have since divorced and since then, left a huge scar on my mind and in my heart. I'll rather give up on the relationship then allow myself to get cheated upon. For this case, i worry he'll cheat on me because i never had the sense of security being with him. Never once has he openly given me the reassurance. I suppose that's his way of showing that we have to trust one another. That and the fact that he was dating somebody else before knowing me, i often wonder if i would share the same fate...

His friendly demeanor towards acquaintances / netizens push drive my fear and jealously while his open'ness' about himself only serves to pick at my suspicion, i find it hard to trust him when he lies so well. I've seen how effortless he tells white lies whenever he's running late and wonder with his open'ness' towards me i would've lower my guards so as to when he wants to lie, it would be so simple because i'd have been so trusting of him by then.

I've overstepped the line between open'ness' and invading into his privacy, i've lost his trust. Due to my inability to trust and put faith in both him and myself. Would he understand, would he trust me again? I hope so... the only thing i can do now is to earn back that trust. It's tough, having to fight my own distrust and learning to trust again. That's just my own pessimistic thinking at work, something i've been trying really hard to change.

His Love has shone through the dark of night, i am taken by the Tenderness we share. It has been a wonderful month full of joy and happiness, we both deserve it. I'm sure there will be many more to come and i look forward towards our future ahead. That's the Hope he has given me.

It's funny how in one of his back entries, he mentioned something about needing to "feel comforted, assured, wanted and desired. Not just a tag along, a last minute decision, a late night arrangement, a phone call." and i was just feeling the same way myself. For the past month i have taken the back seat and put myself out of the way for him. I accommodated my schedule for him and did things his way but it made me feel so expendable. I was making him happy at the expense of myself at times. As and when he wants me, i'm there. He wants to squeeze me in a game mahjong and expects me to company him... i'll do. I do it only because i love him but sometimes it upsets me to think that he hasn't spared a thought for my feelings. I ain't exactly having a ball of a time watch him play mahjong the whole night away.

As the time comes for us to separate, spend less waking hours with each other... it's also time for me to be selfish and think more for myself. I'll still want to company him for mahjong, but only when i have the time and only if that's the only way i can get to spend time with him after an entire week of absence. I feel that this new change will be a test for both of us, a test of Commitment and Faith, of Love and Trust, of Compromise and enduring Companionship.

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Been to a party~

I went to do some freelance bartending for a birthday party last Saturday. Felt pretty much routine cos' it's the third time i've been to the customer's place bartending. The crowd was the same, the food and music pretty predictable. It felt refreshing to be back behind the bar, being busy making drinks and striking up some small talks with familiar faces every once in a while.

After the initial rush to serve the arriving guests and the early cake cutting out of the way, i finally managed to unwind and managed to slip a few sips here and there... (okay, who am i kidding?!) i even managed to concoct my own cocktail, thus far untitled, which is pretty similar to Cosmopolitan, slightly more palatable and less cough syrupy tasting.

Once everything was more or less settled, i had a chat with the birthday boy. At 40, Henk still looks like a cherubic baby with rosy cheeks and a 'heeearthy' laughter. We talked about his 12 years relationship with his partner and how, throughout all those years they have been staying together. He mentioned that since both of them have their own separate lives and work, coming home to one another at the end of each day is what keeps them together and makes them committed to each other. It's like that sweet little desert after a heavy dinner that caps off the entire meal, something to look forward to at the end of each day.

I wish a happy ending for myself and everyone ~ and to many more 12 years ahead to Henk.

Thursday, November 8, 2007

Gone Shopping

Love comes in all chance and circumstances... so why should i be surprised when it came knocking at my door one day when i least expected it to be? Sure, i mean... i have definitely taken a proactive approach but i never once expected much to come out from my senseless bantering with strangers on the web. They were more desperation then anything constructive, a sign of my own destructive nature so bent on desecrating every shot of happiness blessed towards me.

So he came along and suddenly i'm caught in a whirlwind romance. Have you ever watched the movie Casablanca? The romance was just like in the movie, "and here's looking at you kid."

As with life, i supposed... nothing ever comes ~pure~ or for better term, nothing ever comes without baggage. I have mine as well, but i have never thought i'll end up with the same baggage carried over from my last... relationship endeavor. It's like buying two identical bags, the only difference perhaps' the tags attached to them. If anyone's looking for me, tell em' that i've gone shopping and won't be back for a while.

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

Jascablue Bloggersphere Presents : Grinhouse

Planet Photos!!

Well, the past week has been interesting. My 3rd sister was back in Singapore from Japan for a visit and i was around most of the time so we did quite a bit of catching up. My niece has grown so much and it's only been a few months since i last saw her, gosh. She was like so quiet and reserved when she first saw me but warmed up to me quite fast and we spent some quality 'Uncle and Niece' time together. Hehee, she is just sooo adorable!


So we went to Suntec cos my 1st and 3rd sister wanted to go shopping and we had Kenny Rogers for dinner. I can never get enough of the corn muffins there, it's sweet, it's crunchy and it leaves you wanting more!! While waiting to 'ta bao' for my brother-in-law, here's what my adorable niece and i did.


Photo Whoring!!!

Struck her with a very looong straw!!

Trying to grow an Mexican straw moustache.

Me trying to be Dracula... i think she's still stuck with the moustache.

From Mexicans to Indians with the poison darts.

'Lao Fu Zhi' remember?

On the set of "Stab 4" (Trival)

The protege turns her back on the master and does a Chucky impression!

Hence a battle of epic proportion rage on... Star Wars style with our straw sabers. ZzhhinG!

And of cos, who can resist the cute ET? Aww...

Yup yup, i was the one who masterminded the entire photo session, except for that Chucky bit. What can i say... I'm either a really talented photo director or an extremely slutty photo whore. LoL. It's times like these when even i am amazed at how talented i am. *vomit*

PS: The trival i highlighted was an ode to Scream 3. In the movie, they were recreating a movie within a movie and the psuedo movie that was supposed to be produced was named Stab 3. Just one of those useless informations i know. ^_^


Unfortunately my 3rd sis and niece flew back this morning, sigh.. gonna miss them. "Issa, Ah Ku loves youuuuu!!"


Unfortunately again, i don't think it's reciprocated. The night before she left, she actually found time to slut around with my 1st sister's boyfriend...

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Caught In the Act!!!


Kids these days, they really grow up fast. =P


Well luckily, my two best friends knew it was gonna happen and actually came down on Sunday to comfort and console me. (They obviously knew how slutty my niece was and that it's just a matter of time before she breaks my tiny fragile heart) *JOKING*

Jasper was delighted to see them as well, actually, he was so delighted that he tried to pee on both of them! Speaking of him.. here's some more pictures of the cute adorable one.

Jasper beside his (old) pee tray

Him with Mr Cuddly. Turns out he ain't just cuddly, he's also bitably the best size for Jasper.

Jasper up front with his one eye jack saying hi. =P

Baby Jasper before his head gets wet.

After getting wet all over, he looks so diminutive beside the shampoo!

hmm?

Whatcha looking at!

Quite like this picture, the high head room adds volume to his look of melancholy.

Some effects that i tried to do to salvage the lousy photos.

Jasper in a pool of artistic effect flooring. (No! It's not a pool of water!)

Jasper in a shade of grey.


























Hmm... i can't decide which one to keep. Any comments?







































So my friends came and Jo brought along some photo albums for us to reminiscence the good ole' days. Gosh, time flies and suddenly we are already in our twenties looking back on our Secondary school days.

Mahjong was up next that lazy Sunday afternoon. Haha, i love playing mahjong with them cos it's really in a slow pace and we can chat about everything under the sun. It's not too taxing on the wallet as well because we only play 10 cents / 20 cents. Hehee, your's truly was the big winner that day.. i didn't calculate how much i won but it's probably around $4 - $5, not forgetting the last round when i won with a full tile set drawn by myself. I would've gotten another $6 but i didn't collect it from them. That's playing with true friends, it's not the money that matters but the company.

Jo was supposed to be on diet but... haha, she got a craving for Japanese food thus she suggested to go Miramar Hotel where they have this Japanese Restaurant that serves ultra good quality ala carte style buffet. Hmm... how could a greedy piggie like me resist? =P

But before heading off, we did a bit of.... Photo Whoring!!!



My cute baby Jasper.

All three loving the cam treatment.

Me teaching Jasper to look suave. =P




So on with the Jap Restaurant!

We were supposed to take pictures of all the wonder food there... however, hehee, we were just too hungry!! The only picture that managed to get taken by itself was the starter dish. It's basically just raw salmon but the sauce that's included is just so delicious! It's something mixed with ume (plume) that just blends together with the salmon meat. I swear, it's happiness in a mouthful! =P


Food aside, once we ate to our heart's content there was no stopping the photo taking and camera whoring.


Smiling for the camera, warm sake in sight. Oops!

Trying to do those act cute, camera on top to make you look nicer pose... rather unsuccessful. Xiaxue, how you do it wan?!

Group photo taken by a helpful staff.

Another cheesy photo. =P So can imagine whenever i do a cheeky smiley my face is actually like this. Awful..


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Ever wonder how our photo taking session is like, say for example how the above picture got taken? No fret! I've even got it on video! =X








And lately because i've got nothing better to do and was thinking of stretching my photo-editing skills.. here's some things i did. Comments pls!!




I've got some pretty crappy name for the pictures. This one's called 'Finally Jo'.


'Power Sam'

'Slurping Jon'










Also, can't decide on which picture is better... what do you think?
























Well, finally i'm done with the posting! But wait!! This is a double bill so that means there's gonna be another post, omg, so much to blog about!!! =P



~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~


Love Proof

My love life is almost non-existence... so why do i still end up getting hurt and sad? I think i've made a pretty conscious effort not to fall head over heels, that i should wait for the right one to appear. I guess along the way i still manage to mess it up and fall for someone i shouldn't have.

When that happens... it feels like every love songs you hear on the radio is written specially for you. Two songs, singing the same things, about yearning for a love that can never be reciprocated..






Evanescence
Good Enough
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Under your spell again.
I can't say no to you.
Carve my heart and it's bleeding in your hand.
I can't say no to you.

Shouldn't have let you torture me so sweetly.
Now I can't let go of this dream.
I can't breathe but I feel...

Good enough,
I feel good enough for you.

Drink up sweet decadence.
I can't say no to you,
And I've completely lost myself, and I don't mind.
I can't say no to you.

Shouldn't let you conquer me completely.
Now I can't let go of this dream.
Can't believe that I feel...

Good enough,
I feel good enough.
It's been such a long time coming, but I feel good.

And I'm still waiting for the rain to fall.
Pour real life down on me.
'Cause I can't hold on to anything this good enough.
Am I good enough for you to love me too?

So take care what you ask of me,
'cause I can't say no.

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Video, songs and lyrics are copyrighted by Wind-up Records from the album "The Open Door".




Robyn
With Every Heartbeat
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Maybe we could make it all right
We could make it better sometime

Maybe we could make it happen baby
We could keep trying
but things will never change

So I don't look back
Still I'm dying with every step I take
But I don't look back
Just a little, little bit better
Good enough to waste some time
Tell me would it make you happy baby

We could keep trying
but things will never change
So I don't look back
Still I'm dying with every step I take
But I don't look back

We could keep trying
but things will never change
So I don't look back
Still I'm dying with every step I take
But I don't look back

And it hurts with every heartbeat
And it hurts with every heartbeat
And it hurts with every heartbeat
It hurts with every heartbeat
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Video, songs and lyrics are copyrighted by Konichiwa Records from the album "Robyn". This is the record label set up by the singer herself to release her own songs, very cool indeed.



So why do we always end up going for something that is not within our reach? I think it's only human nature to want what we cannot have. But then again, it's also because of that persistence that we end up where we are today, high up in the evolution chain. Are we happier now then before? I can't be the judge of that but i can say we did excel, we did manage to achieve some of the things that was thought impossible before. So i will push on too, i believe only then will i one day be able to move ahead, to be evolutionized, and be to matured.


~I didn't want you from the start, not in that way... but somehow i just fell into you and it made every moment spent with you feels like a sublime bittersweet symphony. I had to break away else my heart will never learn to love again. Thanks for the memories and the blueberry gums~



Friday, October 12, 2007

Kim?

People who knows how i look like, please please tell me, do i look like him?


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Okay, here's where i do a typical 'Ugly Betty' story in reversal (PS: If you have watched the tv show, you'll know that they do a couple of flashback episodes where they reveal the ending at the beginning of the show and start the story as a flashback of sort).

Well, how did i end up with this guy's picture? It started early this week when i was out job hunting in the CBD area (for a cafe job... -_-") when a friend from the bar smsed me, it goes...

AB: Hi Kim.

ME: Err... think you've got the wrong number. I'm Johnny from the bar.

AB: Yeah, i know.

ME: Okay... so why call me Kim?


AB: I saw your ad from the massage website.

ME (all huffy and puffy): WHAT?!? I didn't do such things.
What's the web add, i want to have a look at it myself.


AB: --- No reply ---

So i smsed him the next day insisting for the address and got it. Was a little lazy and so i only went to check it out 2 days later (haha.. -_-") and found the real 'Kim', provided that's his real name lah. From what i know, people in the massage industry rarely give their actual or full name.


So anyway... a few discrepancies to prove that i'm not Kim or Kim's not me, or i am him but not me or he is me but not him.. Err, i think you get the idea... right? =P (Wordplay!)

1 - My name is not Kim (Even if i have a psuedo name it would not be Kim cos living with one is bad enough!! OoOpS... hope my sis is not reading this)

2 - I am *sob sob* 23 yrs old...
... okay lah, 24 this year. =/

3 - I am Chinese also, but but.. people mistaken me for Thai, Jap and Indo-Chn before wor. (cos i act cute mah!)

4 - I am actually shorter and fatter then this Kim fella at XXXcm/ZZZkg. Hard to believe right? =P

The description does sound alot like me... although I'll die before letting anyone call me boy. Seems like my 'fluent English' is also getting worse by the day as what Charlene says, apparently cos i drink too much and am getting brain damaged. -_-"

But still, i think i look so much cuter than him lor... a bit of an insult can.






Hey... chubby is cute orhkaay, i never said handsome or good-looking mah (in which the first category both me and Kim will never be in... the second category will have to depend on individual's perception bahz.)

Was looking thru my pics and was trying to find one of myself in a similiar pose. Found one when i was much younger... which bare 'some' questionable resemblance, you be the judge. (and remember to post your comments!!)

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Well, enough said about that. Oh, for the people who would be interested in Kim's services... please head on down to www.m-powertherapy.com (gotta give the site some props since i'm using the picture right? )

Speaking of which... i got the shock of my life when i saw another one of the masseur advertised there...


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My colleague from the bar!! Shock!! Gasp!!

Well, that's my 'drama'tic life as it is. Till next time`

Monday, September 24, 2007

Definitely Just Another Day!!

I woke up this morning feeling wayyy too groggy, not fully awake yet, to the sound of Jasper’s demanding barks. Sigh… it’s 8am and I’ve yet to make breakfast for him. *Yawn* Was working in the bar last night (and will do so till Tuesday), an abnormality in schedule if you were to know me cos I only work on Fridays and Saturdays. What to do? Especially when I’m downright broke and penniless, gotta work right? Thanks to my understanding fellow colleagues at work, they’ve managed to squeeze in a couple of extra working days for me so I can make the extra ka’chings.

Hmm… how to utilize this week’s earnings? I’m gonna be bring Jasper to the vet on Wednesday so that’s $45 plus $30 for a two way transport. Basic transport and expenses for the week… $20 plus $30, hmm.. that’s an positive forecast lah, and hopefully I can put the rest of my earnings into the bank, top it up to the minimum so the bank don’t deduct any money. =P

Will probably need to cancel my DJ lessons cos I can’t afford to fork out $360 for the remainder of the lessons… probably a good idea anyway cos I suck at DJ’ing and the course itself is lousy; the 8 lessons course does not come with a planned schedule and the instructor seemed unprepared, totally at a lost as to what to teach us, so I’m just gonna go for the 2nd lesson which I had paid for as down payment and just tell them after the lesson is over that I’m too broke to pay. K.C.M life… but on hindsight, would be interesting to see the look on their faces when I tell them that in a straight face. Haha!

Thursday, September 20, 2007

Sick & Tired.. (literally!!) And a Dollop of Lazy

This week has been so exhausting. Since i last signed off, the sickness bug has not left me. Just like a normal sick person, i whine and act in self-pity, locking myself at home and spending majority of my time sleeping. What’s worse is that my body started to have a reaction towards the antibiotics and is now causing swelling on my gums, making it really painful to brush my teeth.

The ulcer on my mouth hasn’t recovered as well, so yesterday I tried to remove the yellow pus surrounding the ulcer. It was really disgusting and there was this one spot that just stuck to the flesh and I had to use a pincher to get it out. Unfortunately… it grew back within half an hour! I was just looking at it 5 minutes ago and I realized that it’s finally healing up and that the yellow pus is actually part of the healing process. Remember the part that was sticking to the flesh and I had to pick it out? Well, now it ain’t growing back and it’s left a red spot in its place, probably an empty hole to boot! Wa… why… why does it always have to be me!!!

If things aren't bad enough, it seems that my behaviour / sickness might have rubbed off on Jasper because just 3 days after moving in, he's becoming more sleep indulgent (or maybe it's because i don't let him out of the cage) and his appetite waning. It's come to a point where his breakfast could be divided into breakfast, lunch and dinner with leftovers for supper. It's definitely not the food because there is no change so i'm suspecting either a mood swing (his cage is right next to the television... he doesn't seemed much affect by it but...) or he's physically sick. At the moment he is still quite active whenever i let him out of the cage so that puts my mind at ease, a little.

The photos… well… haha, I’ve been lazy and really, you can’t blame me.. I’m siiicckk. Okay okay, I’ve got one really miserable photo.. or two.. but it’s a really lousy camera. Eish, so enjoy the pictures and wish me good luck (at training Jasper) and good health (Jasper too!).




Sunday, September 16, 2007

A Series Of Unfortunate Events

After much anticipation and waiting, I've finally gotten my own Corgi!!! The journey before, towards and after getting it however hasn't been smooth sailing at all.

I was out to meet my colleagues for coffee before work on Friday when i noticed a humongous zit seated nicely beside my left nostril. After enduring the teasing and 'advise' from my colleagues to pop it, i realized that i had another problem. An ulcer right on my upper lips. Sigh... no use popping it liao, get rid of one will still have another one, somemore the other one i cannot do anything about. =(

Then after work we went to an acquaintance's place for mahjong and that's when i started to feel the backaches. Initially i thought nothing of it but as the game progressed it got worse and distracted me from the game. I gave up after one round and took flight. Now, normally i take hot showers and that day was no exception, the difference however was that i was shivering throughout the entire time. That's when it hit me... kena fever liao.

After a 4 hours 'invigorating' nap i was woken up by the soreness at my back. Went to check my e-mail to see if there were any replies from the pet farms about the arrival of the Corgi puppies. Lo and behold, 2 male 1 female puppies for sale at Pet Movers and no reply from Ericsson. Gave Ericsson a call and the owner said that he was overseas, damn.. (wasted money to call him) and i was promptly diverted to his sales manager. Was informed that they also have 3 puppies, all male for sale. However, the price comparison of both places were like... comparing heaven and earth. =( Pet Movers offered at $1388 while Ericsson offered from $2600 - $3500. Bladdy hell right?

So anyway, i was told to go down asap as there are alot of buyers for Corgis. No more words needed to be said and i immediately flew down (yah, when in crisis i grow wings and those wings happen to cost me $19) to Pasir Ris Farmway. Took a look from both sides and i could immediately see the difference.

Puppies in P M were lethargic and unresponsive. When they brought them out for me to take a look, none actually turned my way lor, cos they were gazing desperately for their caretakers. I suspect that they are either hungry or underfed. I also noticed that all of them have beige patches on their noses. Only the female caught my eyes but i didn't want a girl girl and after reading all those doggie books has made me a little apprehensive about settling for one that is... 1. Lethargic and unresponsive 2. Has no affinity towards me. 3. Shy when in contact with humans. It might be little exaggerated because it's my own personal experience and i haven't had much experience with dogs.

ERS puppies on the other hand were all healthily active (not those ADD kind that jumps all over the wall) and extremely friendly. I only saw two puppies and i thought to myself, "wah, really selling like hotcakes." Then i met with the sale manager who led me to their private confinement area where he introduced me to the third puppy. (chei..) It was smaller then the other two outside and it was much more furrier, no wait, flurrier, if there is such a word. It appeared more 'kuai' than the others but it cost $3500. I had another look at the outside two, one of them had a clipped tail (was told that it is no longer allowed in Singapore to clip a dog's tail off) and i really liked it as well. Caught between the two dogs, that's when the sales manager made his pitch... "buy a good (expensive) dog with good attributes and health and you'll enjoy his companionship for the rest of your life."

On one side is a slightly louder, more active puppy with a clipped tail and on the other side, a slightly more docile, tiny puppy with extremely flurry fur. Although by national standard a Corgi should have a clipped tail and can definitely not have a soft fur. At that time i was reeling in from the drowsy effect my painkillers were giving me so my judgement could have been impaired and so.. i chose the tiny puppy! It's too cute to ignore and i have a soft spot for the furry ones.

My back was still killing me after returning from the pet farms and by then i still had a slight fever and a swollen thyroid gland on my right neck. It's a little bad of me but i must confess that i hadn't really been much enthusiastic about Jasper (my new Corgi) after his arrival because of all the symptoms. He's sleeping most of the time in the house... =( Was pretty vexed that my sickness wasn't recovering so i went to see a doctor this evening. Turns out my fever was caused by a throat infection (the reason for the swollen thyroid gland) and i was given a strong antibiotic with some painkillers on the side (yummy!).

I'm still trying to toilet train Jasper (he's been half trained) but it hasn't been successful. Once he leaves the cage it's pee everywhere. The trouble with training him is that he's so furry that when he pees, i usually don't see him peeing until after he's done and he doesn't do that sniff floor, circle around pee area thingy. Also trying to teach him the 'look' command so that he'll get used to me as his master quicker. It also serves the purpose of catching his attention... the first step towards training a dog (or so i read).

Well, i'm gonna take 1-2 weeks off work to company him and fully toilet train him. Hopefully by then i will have the 'look' command nailed and progress positively into the 'seat' command. He's already showing signs of being able to understand 'seat' so that's good. Will try to upload pictures of Jasper soon, right now i'm too hammered to care. That's the last of the series of unfortunate events... the only up side to that was getting Jasper and even that is at a major cost of heartache to my flailing bank accounts and wallet. Once more now.. with feelings.. Ouch!

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

The Cost of Clubbing

How much does a person spend on an average night out clubbing anyway. I calculated and realize that i spend about $100 on a single night; from entry to drinks to transport back home.

On the 'special' occasions when i'm really enjoying myself... well, my expenditure for the night can shoot up to $300. My last outing however tops them all at the nifty price of $800. Was i buying a round for the entire bar? No.. Did my 'special' occasions involve a 'special' friend as well? No... So how could i have spent so much?

Well, the answer is simple. Lost and never found! To this day i have lost an approximate 5 wallets, 3 cell phones and 1 bag due to clubbing. The latest to be added into the "Lost n' Never Found" collection? A brand new Canon Digital Ixus 65 worth $600. Tah Da!!

Frigging hell, i tell ya man... how could someone keep making the same mistake time after time? One reason, self-control, or the apparent lack of it. Seems like i can't stop myself from drinking once i start and that leads to getting drunk, and when i get drunk.. boy, all hell breaks loose. I start flirting, get violent, talk in a phony American accent, become emo or just plain fun-loving. Friends never seem to know when i'm drunk and that's the problem.

Well, i'm glad to announce that i wasn't drunk when i lost the camera so yey, one good thing. I still have to buy one back for my sister though (cos it was hers').. Boo! So the next time i head out to the clubs and if you see me, please remind me about the cost of clubbing yeah?